Tuesday Weigh-In and a Myriad of Pictures to Boot!

Today's weigh-in was a good thing.

Breakfast was a Egg and Veggie Bagel with a Clementine.

Delish, with a cup of decaf Pumpkin Spice Tea.

Lunch was a Roast Beef and and Cheese Sandwich
with grapes and pretzels. Mmmm

Last night I decided to do myself a favor by prepping my veggies for the week. A great idea, but how to you keep cucumbers fresh? You don't. So, I "pickled" them. This was a great success, and if you aren't worried about salt, I suggest you try it. I also boiled a half dozen eggs to make my life easier. It's hard to eat the bad things when the good things are an easy choice, right?

I did not get down the gym today because of unforeseen Sprout circumstances, but tomorrow is another day, right? No one said that Operation Healthy Initiative was going to yield quick and easy results. I am happy that I haven't binged in over a week, although today was really hard. I felt like I was starving. I have no idea what that was about. I'm sure that some exercise would help with that. 

Meanwhile, here's my super easy recipe for the "pickled" cucumbers. 

1 cucumber - peeled and sliced in thin rounds

1 cup distilled vinegar

1 cup water

1 cup ice cubes

1/4 cup Kosher Salt

Combine vinegar, water, ice cubes and salt in a 4 cup container with a lid. Add cucumbers. Refrigerate overnight. Eat and enjoy. 

See, I told you it was easy.

The Salad Dressing Solution

I have made a fantastic discovery! I like salad, right? The problem is that most salad dressings have stupid amounts of fat and calories. Sometimes I like the whole oil and vinegar routine, but other times I want a little more flavor. When you add dressing, you have to cut out some of the other good tasting incidentals in your salad, like cheese and cranberries. All those calories tend to add up. What's a person to do?

Enter: BBQ Sauce! I had some lettuce and some chicken. I added some BBQ sauce and voila! Good eats. I highly recommend using BBQ sauce for your salads. Depending on what kind you use, you could easily cut 100 calories and lots of fat as well. While there may be a fair amount of salt and sugar in BBQ sauce, if you aren't using the whole bottle, it's really not so bad. If you're worried about it though, I suggest looking for a sauce with a vinegar base - like an East Carolina Style. If you pick a sauce you already like, I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

Discovering Lox

I'm not sure if it's because I've been taking my medication like a champ or that I have kicked the sugar habit, but I have had a streak of good eating and weight loss this week. I was able to eat some Twizzlers, and not all in one go, and I was satisfied with a reasonable serving of frozen yogurt. Also, I didn't get into an "I must eat ALL the things" mania, so I'm pretty happy. While my commitment to the gym could use some work, my eating habits seem to be moving away from Scary Land and toward Healthville.

This week has been full of mini bagels and home-cooked meals. I think we ate out once. I hope this streak continues, although I am jonesing for some really good Pad Thai. Maybe I'll figure out how to make it for myself. On Monday, I made a big pan of Beef Stir Fry and Rice, which lasted until Thursday. Then we had an evening of "fend for yourself" followed by a big pot of chicken curry which should last until at least Monday. Since I am the queen of cooking too much anyway, these large dishes have been serving quite well.

After my mini break last weekend, I came home with a new love affair: lox. This healthy and delish little fishy food was just what the doctor ordered to get me out of my oat breakfast slump. One mini bagel, some reduced fat cream cheese, enough lox to cover one side, and a generous helping of onion, tomato, and cucumber was my breakfast of choice all week. Paired with some sort of fresh fruit, of course.

If you are interested in eating lox, but think it's too expensive, consider this: I made 2 serving last 6 days, and was more than satisfied. No one needs to be eating a full size bagel in the first place, so if you are using mini bagels, stretching your lox out for a week would be easy. The only problem might be if you don't want to eat lox everyday. It will eventually go bad. If this is the case, I suggest you divide up the servings and freeze all but one. Then, when you want a smoky salmon breakfast, all you have to do it stick a serving in the fridge the night before. Even if you forget, not to worry. Lox is thin. I bet you could put it in some water to thaw while your bagel was toasting and it would be just right by the time you needed it.

The best thing about my tasty bagel breakfasts is this: they satisfy! This allows me to forget about food until snack time, which has been some protein pared with a fruit. I find that as long as I eat get some protein in every snack and meal that I don't wind up back on the binge train to Scary Land. This is good.

235

I am pretty excited because the scale tells me that I have lost 5 pounds. Yay?

I have been doing a pretty good job of not binging as of late, so that's a step in the right direction. Less eating out, more home cooking. I hope to get my act together and start sharing some recipes soon. I have discovered that if I have some protein in every meal and snack that I am much less likely to go on an eating rampage later.

Meanwhile, the exercise part makes me want to cry. I hate going to the gym. I really need a buddy. Alas. I must persevere, otherwise I will never be healthy. I am patiently awaiting the arrival of the autumn weather because then I will be more inclined to take long walks. Assuming the Sprout cooperates.

Better Than Ice Cream

This is the post that I started writing and intended to put up Wednesday night, but fatigue got the better of me - so, here it is, a day late.

Everyone here knows
how to cry . . . Source

My parents started leaving me home alone when I was in the second grade. It was an economic necessity since they had to go on service calls and childcare has always been far too expensive. The rules were: 

Do not go outside.

Do not answer the door.
Do not answer the phone.
Do not use the stove.

I was left to my own devices most of the time after that. I learned to cook food in the microwave, and at some point I got the go ahead to use the sandwich maker to make grilled cheese. Mostly, I ate junk. My mom would buy cases of Fla-Vor-Ice in the summer and I would eat them one after the other until they were gone. I thought I was slick by hiding the wrappers in the couch. I figured that they wouldn't know what I was doing if the remains never wound up in the trash. 

My mom would buy several cartons of ice cream when it was on sale, so there was a steady supply in the house, and I was the only one eating it. I remember that one of my favorite breakfasts/snacks was butter pecan ice cream mixed with Basic 4 cereal. Strangely, it wasn't my mom buying the Basic 4; that came from the next door neighbor. Eleanor was sort of a hermit. She only went shopping once a month at which point she would stock up on everything and buy more than she could fit in her tiny refrigerator. Inevitably we wound up with brand name Pop Tarts, Nutri-Grain bars, yogurt bars, juices, and ice cream. Higher end healthy things that we were too poor to afford. Eleanor wasn't rich, mind you, she just didn't have any bills, so she could safely spend her entire Social Security check on fancy health food.

My parents always tried to refuse these bags of groceries, but the lady was very kind and very persistent. I, on the other hand, being a greedy child, could not wait for Eleanor's shopping trips. I especially loved the ice cream she bought: Bryer's Natural Cherry Vanilla. Have you eaten this stuff? It is sinful. 

They were scary enough without
him, you know. Source

The first time I remember eating the stuff was one Saturday in March or 1994. My mom had taped Gremlins 2 for me the night before and I sat down to watch it after my Saturday morning cartoons. I remember all of this very clearly for several reasons. For one, Eleanor's sister Dolores and her two teen daughters were in town to look in on her. I was very happy to meet Dolores and her daughters, but I was sad because they took Eleanor to the store the day before instead of me and my mom. I had a very boring childhood and visits from Eleanor were really the highlight of my month at times. 

Meanwhile, my mom and dad were under a lot of stress that weekend because an anonymous someone had turned them into the county for having appliances all over the yard. Now stop. I know what you are thinking. My parents were not hoarders. They ran an appliance repair business and they kept derelict machines around for spare parts. There were washing machines, dryers, and refrigerators scattered around the back of the house, but they were all in some state of repair or deconstruction. They were not rusted and falling apart. Even still, with the county breathing down their necks, they had to make quick work of stripping what was there and getting it off of the property. So, while I was in the house watching TV, my parents were in the yard all morning with my Uncle Gene trying to get as much hauled away as possible.

So, as I watched the Gremlins running amok in New York City, everyone congregated at my back door without me knowing it. I was too busy stuffing my face with bowl after bowl of that sweet and delicious cherry goodness. Then, all hell broke loose.

My mom ran into the house screaming "Call 911! Your Dad's having a heart attack!" How old is a person in the second grade? 7? 8? I ran to the phone, but being that we were poor and rented a rotary phone from the phone company, I dialed 9-1 by accident. This was when I first became aware that I am next to useless in a crisis. I stood there with the phone receiver in my hand until my mom snatched it from me and sent me to wet some towels for my dad's face. Wet them, I did. I stuck the towels in the bathtub, under the faucet, and turned it on full blast. When they were soaked, I pulled them out and without wringing them, took them to my mom, who had my dad on the back porch. Really bad in a crisis.

At some point Herb, the First Responder who lived right across the railroad tracks from us showed up. The nice thing about this situation was that my sister's dad was a volunteer firefighter and I literally knew all of the police, firefighters, EMTs, First Responders, and Paramedics in town. All together that amounted to about 10 people since most of them pulled double duty. Seeing Herb, I felt better and I figured he knew what he was doing. 

Crescent City's Finest at
work during a real crisis:
 The Amtrak Derailment of 2002
Source

Then the ambulance showed up. How many medics does it take to get a guy to the hospital? 5, apparently. At this time, a firetruck was dispatched to all 911 calls "just in case", so our tiny trailer was overflowing with people. I was in full on kid panic mode, crying and all. My dad was trying to fight with the paramedics because he didn't want to go to the hospital. My mom was trying to stay as calm as she could, given the situation, and then, somewhere among all this were Eleanor, Dolores, and my uncle. At one point, one of the paramedics got up in my face about my crying. Uh, I'm a kid and my dad is getting wheeled away on a stretcher . . . I think I'm entitled to freak out a little? In hindsight, I think that lady just did not have a way with people. Her oldest son was a good friend of mine later on in high school and he couldn't stand her either. Finally, my dad was in the ambulance and my mom was scrambling to find me a babysitter so she could follow them up to the hospital. 

I would like to tell you all that it was at this point that I annihilated the ice cream, but that would be a lie. I ate the entire half gallon while I was watching the movie, before the chaos ever started. Should this ever come up in conversations, which it has, I tell people that I ate a half gallon of ice cream the day my dad had his heart attack. People who don't know me then assume that this happened when I was an adult, or at least a teenager. They also assume that correlation does imply causation in this instance. I like to let them think that. It's a lot better than admitting to having been a binge eater from childhood with no apparent reason.

I've been really observing how I eat and thinking about my past eating habits. You see, I really like healthy food, and most of the time I think I eat very healthfully. That's because I've been hiding the truth from even myself. The truth is that food is my drug, and it's a hard habit to break. I obsess over food. I binge. When I am dieting, I will eat things and then forget that I even ate them - then I wonder why I'm not losing any weight. It's like being in a trance. I never understood why I could relate to Trainspotting so much until recently. I'm a junkie, and my "junk" is food. Sugar is my number one choice, but like Rents and Sick Boy, I'll take what I can get. While they are scamming pills off geriatrics to cook up some more heroin, I'm convincing myself that I can binge on salad because it's healthy. I can eat a pound of strawberries in one go because they're fruit and fruit is good for you. But this is like taking methadone; it just masks the addiction until eventually I fall off the wagon and I've eaten an entire cake by myself. Or a jar of Nutella. Or, God forbid, a half a gallon of ice cream. 

I can see how Edmund turned Judas and sold his soul for some Turkish Delight. If some witch showed up in a sleigh and offered me a room full of processed sugar, I'd give her offer some serious consideration. I don't think I would sell out my family or anything, but I wonder if I haven't traded my soul for refined sugar already. 

I am a woman of many addictions - this is one of mine. What are some of yours?

Duran Duran and Atheists Inspire Me

Actually, I'm a "concerned agnostic",
but we'll cover that later. Source

Also, I can never spell Atheist right the first time. It's hard!

I have not been around here lately because I've had nothing new to report. Well, that's not true, I've been making a lot of discoveries about myself with regard to my health, but I didn't want to write about all that without some action points to go with them. Now I have a good idea of some problems and solutions though, so I am going to give you all an update.

I am addicted to sugar.
I talked about this at length today at First Person Narrative, if you care to read about it. The short of it is, I have a binging problem, but mostly with sugary things: cake, cookies, ice cream, and candy. I think the only way to "kick the habit" as it were, is to go cold turkey. So, as of today I am on the wagon. No more sweets. For now, I am limiting this to the things listed above. While i could binge on Raisin Bran and Orange Juice, I don't see that happening. I was thinking about it, and if I have ever tried to overeat something that was good for me (fruit, salad, vegetables) I get full and or sick before I get very far. I can eat a whole cake in one go, if I were so inclined, but I've rarely drank a whole gallon of OJ in one sitting. If I find that I have eaten a whole box of cereal for breakfast one morning, I will of course re-evaluate what I am restricting in my diet.

I need a sense of urgency.
I stayed up for 24 hours the other day because I needed to make a cozzerole and then deliver it to j^C's work at 6 am. I was afraid that if I went to sleep I would not get up and out the door in time, so I just stayed up. I didn't want to let anyone down, you see. People were counting on me and I had given my word. My word to other people motivates me. My word to myself is meaningless. I think this is because when you tell someone else that you are going to do something at a certain time, it creates urgency. If you are doing something for yourself, you can always put it off, procrastinate, and make excuses about why it's not really important. Somehow, I have to give my health and well being value and urgency so that I will bend over backward to make my goals happen. I'm surely worth more than 100 nameless soldiers, but I don't ever feel that way.

I need an accountabilabuddy.
Captain Tesla started the idea of Operation Healthy Initiative, and I bet she's improving her health by leaps and bounds. I stole her idea and started this blog as a form of accountability for myself, and I've gotten nowhere. Then, I started working with an online personal trainer. That's still coming together, and I know that if I start emailing her everyday, I will probably get a lot more out of the relationship. My worst problem is that I don't like working out alone, and when I am by myself, I don't push very hard, if I can even make myself go at all. It would be ideal if I could work out with Captain Tesla, but she lives in the magical land of Pensacola, Florida while I sit and rot in here in Richmond Hill, GA. I am hoping that my one and only local friend will be willing to go to the gym with me once after her 6 week postpartum appointment. Otherwise, this is a problem that is identified and as yet unsolved.

It is my hope and intention to start updating you all with pictures, in addition to working on the three points listed above.

Now, about the atheists.
It all really goes back to Duran Duran. Everything does, because they are the Holy Hair, and let's not forget it, ok? Yesterday I got the inclination to start reading about Simon Lebon. I saw the video for "Do You Believe in Shame" which up until yesterday, I never knew existed. I honestly never knew the song was even released as a single, and clearly it was not very popular as I've rarely heard it mentioned on fan sites. I knew that it was a song by Duran Duran because someone had an AngelFire fan site of the same name back in the late 90s. I always liked the name and I'm sure I had heard it at least once because it was on the album Big Thing which I owned on cassette. I am proud to say that I think I own every album Duran Duran has ever made, either on vinyl, cassette, or CD. Oh yeah, and digitally! I downloaded All You Need is Now before it was available on CD. But you don't care about that.

Anyway, I went down the Wikipedia rabbit hole, and soon discovered that this song was the first part of a trilogy written by Lebon concerning the death of a close childhood friend. The second song is "Ordinary World" my all time, end all, be all, favorite song EVER, and the third song is "Out of My Mind", another seriously underrated song from 1997's Medazzaland album. This got me thinking about the friend and I started trying to find out some more information about him. The Wikipedia rabbit hole led to a dead end on that topic, but I did discover that Simon had contributed to a book called The Atheist's Guide to Christmas. I was never certain what his views on faith were, although I suspected he might not be a believer based on the song "None of the Above".

Who wouldn't want to fall down a "Me" rabbit hole?
Source

It turns out Lebon is a "concerned agnostic" -  which means I sit on the fence a little bit because it’s too arrogant to say there is no God. I am willing to become a believer if someone could prove it to me, but I am not going to take other people’s word for it. A lot of my thoughts are in this book and it will make a great Holiday present for people – the book is quite funny and intelligent and it will get you thinking. Simon”

But how did Simon Lebon, frontman of my favorite band, wind up an essayist in The Atheist's Guide to Christmas? Apparently, the girl behind the book Ariane Sherine used to hang out outside of Warren Cuccurullo's apartment in London while the boys were cutting Medazzaland. My first thought was "Why couldn't I be hanging out outside Warren's apartment while the boys were cutting Medazzaland?" Because I was 10. Anyway,  Simon thought Ariane was a smart girl and he wanted to lend his support to her book - which was the first atheist charity book campaign (they donated all of the advance and half of the sales to The Terrence Higgens Trust). After reading about the book, I went down the Wikipedia rabbit hole once again because I wanted to know more about this chick who hangs out with my favorite band and who gives money to one of my favorite causes.

This led me to her blog, which I though would be A) active and B) about writing (since she is primarily a journalist). What I found, was a weight loss blog that had been abandoned in November 2011, after she lost her baby weight. I was disappointed, but after looking through it a little, I was also inspired. While I feel that her actual method of losing weight was less than healthy, I liked her accountability method: she took a picture of the scale every week, to document her progress. I think this is a great idea. I am going to post my scale picture on here every Monday, and hopefully that will keep me on the beaten path for the rest of the week. I think it would be rather mortifying to post 240 for weeks on end, or to have it creep back up. So, thank you Ariene Sherine for the great idea.

That should be me.
Nick Rhodes should be there too.
This photo is property of Duranasty.com.

Now all I have to do is make friends with you so that I can hang out with Duran Duran. I guess I better get on this weight loss thing first, though.

Walking to Afghanistan and A Rant About Grapefruits

Is it just me, or does this look a little dirty? Source

Friends, I am walking to Afghanistan. Sort of.

In an effort to be healthier and to make some new friends, That Sprout and I are signed up for 2nd Brigade Walk to Afghanistan. My manageable, yet noble goal has been to log 3 miles per day. Sadly, we are on day 11 or so of the challenge and I've yet to log any miles at all. I need to start walking, or playing catch-up is going to be brutal. Luckily, I can get miles from running, walking, skipping, or crawling indoors or out.  Treadmills, ellipticals, bikes, skates, even swimming is allowed. So, hopefully I won't have too much catching up to do. I'll keep you updated on my progress, to be sure. If any of you are interested in joining, I'm sure it can be done. Just leave me a comment and I'll get back to you with the details!In the meantime, I want to talk to you about my favorite healthy powerhouse food: the humble grapefruit.

My love for grapefruit knows no bounds. I love everything that is grapefruit, tastes like grapefruit, smells like grapefruit, or even looks like grapefruit. If I see grapefruit candy, soda, or pastries they are quickly bought and devoured. I'll buy grapefruit soaps and hand lotions, should I find them. If there were ever a grapefruit handbag, it would be mine. I had grapefruit cupcakes for my birthday this year. I will even drink an IPA beer (a variety which I despise) if it is advertised as having "a hint of grapefruit". Pink, white, ruby, I don't care. I love the perfect blend of bitter, sour, and sweet that these large citrus wonders have hiding beneath their soft and thick peels.

I have living a sad and mostly grapefruit free existence for a while now. I take a couple of medications that say "do not take with grapefruit". In the interest of my health, I have abstained. But recently, I got desperate. There is nothing healthier and more enjoyable than a bowl of oatmeal and a half a grapefruit in the morning. I need to start amping up my vitamin C intake, as winter will soon be upon us and I don't like being sick. I figured a combo of kale oats and grapefruit would be a great way to achieve this without supplements. I'm doing good to remember the essential pills I need to take everyday. Vitamins and supplements are assuredly doomed to failure. I decided to talk to my pharmacist to see if there was some way I could add the banished fruit back into my diet. There was! She said as long as I don't eat an excess of grapefruit on one day and then none for a few days, I should be fine. A half for breakfast would post no problems, no matter what the consistency.

You better believe I made my way down to the supermarket ASAP and bought some fruit! I decided to take things slow, and only bought two to begin with. I decided I wanted pink ones. I thought they would look pretty. Then next morning, I was shocked to see that they were not pink inside, but white. No worries, it tasted good. Maybe all the citrus got mixed up on the stand or something. The next time I went to the store, I decided to get a bag of Ruby Red ones. They were on sale. How could I resist?

Yesterday, I was having PMS cravings and in order to keep myself from baking 4 dozen chocolate chip cookies and eating them all at once, I opted to eat me a grapefruit instead. I sliced it open, expecting to see the pretty red color inside. This did not happen. It was white. Again. Now, this time, it was not a mistake on my part. When I say I bought a bag, I mean they were already in said bag, sealed, and with a little tag that said "Ruby Red Grapefruits". So, either the people sorting the fruit are color blind or corporate farmed grapefruits are milktoast in the color department.

Maybe I'm just spoiled. I grew up in rural Florida. Everyone had citrus trees and in the winter you would see old men on the side of the road with net bags full of oranges, tangerines, and grapefruits. They were fresh off the trees, juicy, vibrant, and always, always, delicious. Storebought citrus, it's just not the same.

Sugar. Heroin. And the Difference Is?

Sucrose suppositories. You know, to take the edge off.
Source

My friend Skye posted the following as her Facebook status this morning:

I just read that treating yourself to chocolate for breakfast can help you with craving sweets for the rest of the day......I just ate 3 brownies and wouldn't mind 3 more. Where do they get their stats?

I am inclined to agree. I try to eat cooked oat groats for breakfast every day in an effort to lower my cholesterol. My favorite way to eat oatmeal of any sort is with eggs, vegetables, salt, pepper, olive oil, and cheese. I don't do the whole cinnamon and brown sugar thing - in fact I find it quite gaggy. I thought I would give myself a treat last week though, and decided to top my groats with a smattering of butterscotch and semi-sweet chocolate chips. There were pecans involved as well, and it was pretty much delicious. I thought I was doing myself a favor, getting the sugar out of the way early in the day. 

Not so. Every day that started with my modest sugar consumption seemed to snowball into a sugar binge. I felt like a junkie. Every moment was spend wonder when and where my next hit of sugar was going to come from. Weight loss ground to a halt. Water was retained. Caffeine was consumed. Sleep was lost. My body became a jittery roadmap of pain until the sugar coma finally overtook me. After two or three days of this, I added a bag of Kale to the rest of the cooked groats and started to feel better.

I am realizing more and more that sugar makes me feel like crap in general, and that starting the day off with it is a particularly bad idea. Don't let General Mills fool you, it is a drug. A tasty, tasty drug. The high might be good for a minute, but the low and the crash sucks for days. 

I need to stop the madness. I need to break the addiction. I wonder if Betty Ford will take my case?

From the Laboratory of Uranium J . . .

OHI Confessions: I ate out this weekend and I was generally bad as far as eating. The silver lining is that I was far more active than normal, so maybe that canceled my poor food choices. As of right now, I am recommitting to OHI. I have a lot more energy right now and I plan to use this to my advantage. I feel like my meds are really working well for me right now. I have a fairly positive attitude, and I don't feel totally out of control, so I'm counting it as a win.

 That Sprout and I will be on our own for the next 25 days or so as j^C is in Louisiana on a teaching engagement. In order to keep ourselves busy, I have decided to undertake some "little projects". These are science and engineering projects, so I feel kind of like a mad scientist in her lab. I'm pretty excited about this. It's nice to have the energy and the drive to get some things done.

My first science project is already under way. Even as we speak, I have a very pretty jar basking in the sun on my front walk full of what will soon be chamomile detox tea. If this goes well, I plan to use up all my medicinal teas and then start brewing some herbal teas. Hopefully, That Sprout will like them and we can end our dependence on store bought juices. Right now, the goal is to A) discover whether or not the jar leaks, and B) find out if the tea tastes good. I am sure any leaks can be fixed, it's the taste I'm not sure about. At any rate, I hope to get That Sprout in on the action soon - I remember making sun tea with my mom when I was little and it was a lot of fun.

I'm also experimenting with my daily facial routine. Right now I am having my first acne breakout since high school. My face is covered in a myriad of pimples, zits, whiteheads, and boils. Not pretty and very painful. I bought some Clearasil the other night with the hope that it would help. I have really dry skin, so the goal is to keep my skin properly moistened without encouraging the growth of more acne. Thankfully, I have a doctor's appointment this week, so I will be bringing this up. I have a feeling this is a reaction to my medicine.   Let's hope it goes away soon and my skin care efforts are not in vain. I am proud of so few of my physical attributes, I need to have at least one trait that gives me confidence.

I am going to leave you all for now - I've got other projects and experiments to start. Hopefully I'll have good news to report to you all later. :-)

OHI: Skating

It was this kind of a day. Source

Today was a beautiful day. The temperature never got rose out of the 80s, there was a nice breeze, and the sun was shining high in the sky. I was inspired to go out and bask in nature.

This was easier said than done.

Last night I increased my medication dosage for the final time, doubling the highest amount I had taken up to that point. The result was ZombieJ 2.0. It was a real feat for me to even get out of bed today. I am proud to say that I persevered and wound up going rollerblading.

I chose a very pretty and secluded spot for my skating adventures as the last thing I needed was for some out of school adolescent seeing me eat pavement or something. I happy to report that I did not add asphalt to my diet today. Thank goodness.

The above mentioned secluded spot is my former gym. It went out of business and is now an empty piece of property looking for a buyer. There's lots of space to skate on even pavement while still feeling like I am in the woods. The building sits far off the road, behind a small field and in front of a small forest. I really loved it when my gym was still there. I didn't go as often as I should have, but when I did it felt like going to the spa.

After two very wobbly trips around the building on my skates I decided to take a breather by sitting on the front porch. While sitting there, I decided that this was going to be my special place and I would try to come as often as I can to run, skate, meditate, write, and do yoga. The selfish part of me truly hopes that the place doesn't sell until after I move, whenever that is.

After my skating adventure I went home and pretty much slept the rest of the day away. We were planning on going to trivia tonight, but that didn't happen, so I went to try the newest restaurant in town. Not impressed.

Upon returning home full of middling martinis and sub-par cake it occurred to me that if OHI is going to work, I need some rules. I did pretty well on the eating today (more on that Friday) but the evening's outing sort of blew it. So, for my sake as well as posterity, I now give you Uranium J's OHI Rules and Regulations for Success.

1. No sweets - if you want something sweet, eat some fruit or a smoothie.
2. No alcohol - really, what's the point?
3. Drink 1 gallon of water a day - starting early is the key to success.
4. No eating out - if you can't calculate calories, you can't eat it.
5. Keep track of calories.
6. Walk with The Sprout for 1 hour every day starting at 1:30 pm.
7. Go to the gym every day a 4 pm.
8. Get 8 solid hours of sleep every night.
9. Take meds consistently.
10. Be Honest.

Number 10 may be the most important rule. If I am honest with myself and my peers (readers) I will be held accountable, and accountability is tres important.

I am also going to go ahead and set a goal for myself today. By August 1, I want to weigh 225 pounds. I want to be able to make 5 continuous loops around the derelict gym. I want to be able to jog around the gym 5 times as well. By October, I want to run a 5k. There, I said it. Let's make it happen. Also, let's hope this weather holds out, huh?

More on Oats . . .

The Sexiest of Oatmeals. Source

I told you I had more oat recipes in my hat and now I'm here to deliver the goods.

My love affair began this past winter when I decided I wanted to try my hand at eating "savory oatmeal". It was cold and I wanted a warm bowl of comfort. I knew that oats were good for me, but after many attempts at making them something I could stomach, I had given up. Raisins, craisins, and apples had been merely tolerable in oats cooked in water and apple juice. Other types of fruit were just short of nauseating. Spices helped matters, but only minimally. I was convinced that the only kind of oatmeal I could stomach was that sugary crap that comes in little packets with dehydrated strawberries. Sweet oats and me were never to be. But maybe something savory, yes? Salt - cheese - chicken perhaps?

Maybe my readers are unfamiliar with the corn based breakfast porridge call "grits". These are ground hominy boiled in water like rice. Most people eat them with butter and salt, some people get fancy and add cheese and meats. They are pretty tasty, depending on who makes them. You will often see them served in restaurants as this runny mess that quickly spreads and overtakes the entire plate. This is not how you are supposed to eat them. This is yuck. Grits should be so thick that you can easily eat them with a fork. You should be able to scoop them onto your fork, turn it over, and have them stay put. If they aren't of this thick and stable consistency, don't eat them. Just don't.

It occurred to me that grits and oats were somewhat similar, and if you could put meat and cheese in grits, why not try it with oats? After a little searching, I stumbled across Sexed Up Savory Oatmeal. Since the cheese in that recipe was pretty fancy pants and I could rarely be bothered to cook steel cut oats, I modified it for what would work in my reality. What I came up with is this:

Uranium J's Basic Savory Oats

1/2 c 1 Minute Oats
1 c water
1/4 c finely shredded Sharp Cheddar
1 tbsp Olive Oil
Sea Salt
Ground Pepper

Place Oats and water in a microwave safe dish. Microwave for 2 minutes. This insures a very thick consistency. Add oil, cheese, salt and pepper to taste. Mix well. Eat. 

This is heaven. Now, I have made a similar dish with steel cut oats - and it is better than heaven. If you are up to waiting the 45 minutes it takes to cook steel cut oats, go for it. It's definitely worth it.

If you are looking to add some more nutrients to the dish, try adding some cooked chicken pieces or eggs. This adds a good deal of protein to an already super healthy meal. You could also try adding some favorite veggies. I have yet to be this daring, but I know that it's been done. Just the other day, I discovered the holiest of oatmeal holies: Add Buffalo Sauce. Eat. Transcend.

As for Operation Healthy Initiative - food intake is going well. Exercise needs to happen today, and I need to make a plan to make it happen. More to come.

"Operation Healthy Initiative" or, Why I Love Captain Tesla

Yesterday, Captain Tesla mentioned on her blog that she was beginning "Operation Healthy Initiative" in order to prepare for a ballet performance of epic proportions. I am bowled over that I helped to inspire OHI by posting what I eat here. In turn, I was inspired to join her on her healthy journey. It's always better to have a partner in crime - whether you are causing trouble or getting your act together. (I totally wish we were causing trouble, but we have to be adults. Tanqueray, my old friend, how I miss you.) What we are planning to do is post what we eat and how much we exercise. In order to make this more interesting to the average reader, we are also posting healthy recipes that we come up with. Since I've not been able to work out yet today and my food intake consists of:

• 1/2 serving of "Overnight Oats"
• 1 giant cinnamon muffing
• 1 overly large latte
• 1 Coke Zero

I will be sharing with you the first of what I hope is a series of tasty recipes chock full of heath that will sate your hungry tummies. Today's recipe is the aforementioned "Overnight Oats". I totally stole this idea from Julie at pbfingers.com. I hope that we can become blog buddies, but for the moment I am just another reader of her awesome healthy lifestyle blog. 

What are "Overnight Oats"? Simply put, they are uncooked oats that soak in some sort of fluid overnight in the refrigerator, thus tenderizing them and making them suitable for human consumption. I suppose you can use either Rolled Oats or Steel Cut - the original recipe called for Rolled, but I prefer Steel Cut, so that's what I've been using. In the interest of not overloading on calories, this makes for a rather small bowl of oats, but they are pretty filling and full of vitamins and minerals. Not to mention, they are very tasty.

Cinnamon Apple Overnight Oats

Look how proud she is of us. Source

1/4 cup Steel Cut Oats 

1 tablespoon Chia Seeds

1/4 cup Unsweetened Apple Sauce

1/4 cup Silk Unsweetened, Unflavored Almond Milk

Cinnamon to taste

Combine all ingredients in a bowl. Mix well. Cover in saran wrap. Refrigerate overnight. Serve in the morning.

Simple, right? You are probably wondering "Why Chia Seeds and what are they?". Chia Seeds are those things you spread all over your Chia Pet, but they also happen to be a super healthy thing to eat. They are high in protein (2 grams per tablespoon), as well as omega fatty acids, which is good for 2 reasons. 

1. Omega Fatty Acids are good for your heart.
2. The nutrients in Oats are fat soluble.

That means you have to eat the oats with some sort of fat in order for your body to break the good stuff down and use it. The Chia seeds add should add just enough healthy fat to do the job. They also serve to bulk up the dish as they are high in fiber. Once they've soaked, they are very similar to kiwi seeds and they take on the flavors of the apples and cinnamon - delish.

A few more facts about oats, while we are on the subject: They help to lower your bad cholesterol and to stabilize your blood sugar. As someone with a history of high cholesterol and a family history of diabetes, these are the kinds of things I like to see in my food. It doesn't hurt that I love oats. I used to think I hated them, but over the past several months I've learned that I just hate rolled oats as a sweet porrage. It doesn't work for me. Thankfully, I've been doing some creative things with oats in the kitchen, so rest assured, this isn't the last Oat-y post from Uranium J.

What's Cooking?

The fish was delish and made quite a dish. Source

I went to the doctor this morning. Hilarity insued.

Last week, someone from the doctor's office called me in reference to another doctor to whom I had been referred. By them. As it happened, that doctor did not accept my insurance. I was told that I should find out what specialists would accept my insurance and then get back to the office with a name. I wondered to myself "Why wouldn't I just make the appointment myself, at that point?". It seemed as though they were asking me to do their jobs for them. I was a little irritated, but I let it go in the interest of resolving a larger issue.

The doctor had given me a prescription on the first of June for a 30 day supply of pills. They were 50 mg a piece. The following Monday, he told me that I was  to start increasing the dosage gradually until I was taking 150 mg a day. That's 3 pills a day, if math's not your thing. I realized that even with a refill, I would run out of pills long before my July 6th follow up appointment. Since I had someone from the office on the phone last week, I brought this concern up. The office representative told me to wait for until I was about to run out of the refill to ask the office for another prescription. I was unsure about this at the time, but decided that the lad must know what he was talking about.

As of yesterday morning, I was down to one pill. No worries, I thought. I'll just trot down to the friendly local CVS and pick up my refill.

Alas, it was not to be.

The kindly pharmacist scanned the refill and informed me that my insurance would not pay for it at this time. Why? I had gone through 30 days worth of pills in 17 days. Therefore, I had either been popping them or pushing them. Either way, it was not a good look. I was aggravated, as it seemed as though the doctor's office could have easily avoided all this, but aggravation would get me nowhere on a Sunday afternoon. I needed 2 more pills for my dosage that night. I had to have some pills, if not all of them. I was able to buy the 2 pills I needed to the tune of $8.045 a piece.

This morning, I found myself back at the doctor's and explaining the situation. Apparently, the doctor had to see me face to face in order to write me a new script. After waiting for close to an hour, I finally saw him. He spoke to me like I was stupid, wrote me a new prescription, gave me some samples, and sent me on my merry way. I thought the problem was solved.

After a nice lunch with j^C, I went to my friendly Target Pharmacy to drop off the prescription. I then learned that for whatever reason, the insurance still wouldn't pay for the damn things. So, now we wait and see what will come of that. For the time being, I have enough pills to last the next 20 days, thanks to the samples. With any luck, the issue will be resolved by then.

Meanwhile, while the doctor (who I am now certain is over medicated himself) was speaking to me like a child, he informed me that the increased dosage of this medication was going to cause me to gain weight. In order to counteract this side effect, I was going to have to become very mindful of that which goes into my mouth from now on. Hence, "What's Cooking?"

I am going to try to start posting what I eat on here in an effort to track my intake. I can't be gaining weight and we all know I need to lose some.

So, without further ado, here's what I ate today:

Some mini vanilla wafers (100 cal)
Visalus Shake (465 cal)

• Shake Powder (90 cal)
• Banana (120 cal)
• 2 tbsp Peanut Butter (200 cal)
• 8 oz Almond Milk (35 cal)
• 1 tbsp cocoa powder (20 cal)

General Tso Chicken Lunch Special (600 cal?)

Lg Latte (180 cal)

1 ginger snap (negligible calories)

Some Orange Juice (90 calories)

Sloppy Charlies (400  calories)

Some grapes (150 calories)

Total: 1985 cal

Not bad. Now, to add in some exercise. More on that conundrum to come. Meanwhile, let me share with you all the glory and wonder that is "Sloppy Charlie". If you are a fan of "Sloppy Joe", then this will be right up your alley. Take 1 can of Sloppy Joe sauce. Add 2 cans of drained tuna. Combine. Heat. Eat on whole wheat bread. Yum! I suggest you try it if you are looking for something quick and tasty for dinner. I hope to add some pictures and more inventive recipes at some point in the future.

In other news, there's lots cooking in the creative department as well. The inspired juices are still flowing and I am happy to report that a fair amount of writing has been happening. Let's hope this trend continues. More on that to come as well. For now, happy eating!

The Drive-thru Conundrum: A Pointless Post

 Source

It's just so easy, isn't it? No cooking, no preparation, no dishes, no wait. I don't even have to worry about getting the Sprout out of the car. I say "Hey, I'm hungry!" and pull in somewhere. Five minutes later, away I go with no less than a soda and fries, and maybe a burger or some other cholesterol laden monstrosity. As I drive away, munching my fries and slurping my soda, I am filled with a perverse satisfaction from the grease, carbs, salt, and sugar. I don't even like french fries, and yet, I scarf them down, savoring the salty, greasy goodness. There's just nothing like fast food, and try as you might to find a "healthy replacement" - it ain't never gonna happen. 



Carrots? Celery? Are you mad? Source



First of all, part of the beauty of fast food is that someone is handing you a hot meal that you can eat with your fingers on the go. Healthy food comes in two varieties: Cold and Portable or Hot and Stationary. Hot food is always more satisfying that cold. There's no way you're going to be happy with an apple and some celery sticks when you could be eating a burger and fries on the go. Now, if you were so inclined to wait, in half an hour you could have a healthy soup, a fish filet and veggies, or even a casserole. We are the "now generation" though. That's waiting and work that we aren't interested in. So, the fries win. 



 I'll cook. You. Source



Secondly, even if you were so inclined to wait, go home, and *gasp* cook, you're not going to find a healthy alternative to all that grease and salt. Grease and salt are not healthy, and they've yet to develop a food tricky enough to make us forget about that kind of decadence. Who wants a boneless, skinless chicken breast with a green salad and steamed veggies knowing that there's a Zaxby's that just opened up down the street?

Bearing all of this in mind, I've got to at least try to find a solution. I'm going to die someday soon if I don't, and I'll be talked about like Mama Cass. Her ham sandwich will become my Coke and Fries. It will be embarrassing. 

At least I have a reasonable solution to the soda problem. La Croix sparkling water is like a gift from the gods. It provides me with my bubble fix. The caffeine is a different story . . . I always wanted to have an addiction, you know, for my street cred. Little did I know, I had one all along. Hmm.

As for the salt thing, the best I can think of right now is Pretzels. That's pretty uninspiring. Jerky comes to mind, but that tends to give me heartburn. Salted avacado would be good, but it's not really portable. All this is cold food anyway . . . so it's bound to be unsatisfying. Maybe some Edamame . . . I don't know.

This seems hopeless. I just need more self control. And more gum. Lots more gum. Soooo much gum.

Breaking Rituals: Iced Honey Vanilla Chamomile Almond Milk Tea

Delicious. Double Delicious.

Going with the lack of restraint theme, let’s talk about food rituals. I was reading the other day about Diet Coke addiction. I do love soda, but I find that what I love most is the bubbles. A healthy alternative for that is easy to come by – just drink sparkling water. La Croix makes a great sparkling water in several different flavors. No sugar, no sodium, no bad stuff at all. My favorites are the coconut and the grapefruit. The article said the way to break an addiction is to fill the two needs that an addiction creates: comfort and ritual. Ritual is where things get complicatedfor me . Reading this, I realized that a lot of my problem with overeating is that I’ve got a lot of rituals tied up with food. Any trip in the car has turned into an excuse to buy something pre-packaged. This is the worst when I am on road trips. For some reason, my monkey brain tells me that it’s anything goes. In everyday life, any trip in the car is a reason for at least a drink. I'm thirsty. the drinks, it’s mostly Starbucks, and of Starbucks, it’s mostly Green Tea Frappucinos. In each and every situation where I have a ritual justifying my consumption of garbage, I could just as easily plan ahead.

I’m not going to try tackling the fast food thing just yet. Right now, I am looking for something to fill the void in my life that will be left when I finally give up Starbucks Green Tea Frappucinos. It will be a sad day. I am thinking of hanging a wreath on the door. I am now in the beginning stages of experimenting with things that may take that delectable green drink’s place. Tonight I made and Iced Honey Vanilla Chamomile Almond Milk Latte. It was pretty good, no Green Tea Frap, but definitely worth an encore. It was made all the more tasty by virtue of my brown reusable Copco Stir & Sip Cup. I love these cups. They are nice looking, the perfect size, and their straws are the sturdiest I’ve encountered. Their design also allows me to pretend that I am drinking from a Starbucks cup. Now, if only they could get those great straws in green . . .

Iced Honey Vanilla Chamomile Tea Latte

• 8 Celestial Seasonings Honey Vanilla Chamomile Tea Bags
• 2 cups of water
• Almond Milk

Bring water to a boil. Place tea bags in boiling water. Turn off heat and allow tea to steep for 5 minutes. Squeeze water from each tea bag. Place in a container with a lid and allow to cool. Once cool, fill a large cup or glass 1/3 of the way with tea concentrate. Fill the rest of the way with ice. Top with Almond Milk and mix well. Enjoy!

* Amount of tea concentrate and Almond milk may be adjusted for taste.

Dance! Dance!

I've been listening to a lot of NKOTB since yesterday. I'm sure this momentary obsession started with Whitney Houston videos and as you know, one link leads to another. That, coupled with my efforts at house cleaning to the tunes of The Backstreet Boys inspired to me download the NKOTBSB album - The Deluxe Edition. 

What does that mean, dear friends? 

It came with videos! And I love music videos. I love music videos maybe more than I love music itself. They are the perfect combination of my two favorite things in the whole world: music and film making. If there's badass dancing thrown in the mix, I'm on cloud nine. 

I love to watch dancing in particular, as it's something I would love to be able to do myself. Sadly, I have ZERO hand eye coordination. My friend Josh, he tried to teach me how to dance in high school, but it was hopeless. This, more than anything else is why cheerleading didn't work out for me. My monkey brain cannot comprehend choreography. Like Salieri, I am imbued with a love and a lust for dance but am "rewarded only the ability to recognize the incarnation."

This? This is not good dancing. This is embarrassing.

But maybe not for long.

We've all heard that in order to make any exercise regimen last, we need to be doing something we actually like to do. Well, I don't like doing much by the way of physical activity. If I did, I wouldn't have the health problems that I do. Rollerblading requires equipment I can't afford right now, racquetball requires a court, and it's way too cold for swimming. I like to run, but I always mess that up after a few days of overdoing it. It also doesn't help that I don't like doing anything in public because I'm self conscious. 

I'm good at the Cupid Shuffle. Can I just Cupid Shuffle through life?

I was thinking about it though - dancing is basically an aerobic exercise. I want to learn to dance. You tube is free. This could be the answer to my problems. I am going to teach myself how to dance. I don't know what exactly, I was thinking Janet Jackson, but after watching Rhythm Nation, that's master class stuff. Maybe early Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera, you know, before they knew what they were doing. I do love the way that Lady Gaga dances . . . maybe that’s where I’ll start. Something about the way she moves reminds me of me. The crappy thing about videos is that the dance is always interrupted by cuts . . . We'll see what happens. I'm pretty excited about this, if I can make it happen. It really helps, knowing that I am able to get YouTube to play on the TV through the PS3.

Updates: the dog is doing better and strangely enough, I have not had much of an appetite as of late. I hope this trend continues, it's really helping not to binge. It's nice to feel like I am in control of what goes in my mouth for a change. I am looking forward to a long week of housecleaning . . . you know, in the same way one looks forward to a vasectomy. I hope to have things spic and span before I go to Florida for the weekend. You know, it's always nice to come home to a clean house, a feeling rarely get to enjoy.

Gloo-Ton

I would love a world where everything was a smorgasbord and I could just have a little bit of everything. I read once where this woman lost like 100 pounds through the “3 bite rule”. She could eat ANYTHING she wanted – providing that she stopped at 3 bites. This would be great for me. 3 bites of toast, 3 of hash browns, 3 of the strawberry waffle, 3 of the chocolate chip one, 3 of eggs, 3 of ham, 3 of biscuits and gravy and I’m done. But that’s not the way the world is manufactured. To accomplish the above, I would order a whole meal plus another waffle, plus a half order of biscuits and gravy and heaven forbid I should want some grits.

The situation is further complicated and plunges into Shakespearean levels of tragedy by virtue of the fact  that my husband is for all intents and purposes greedy and wholeheartedly refuses to share food for any reason, ever. See, if he were to order a whole meal and I were to order an extra waffle and a half order of biscuits and gravy and if I were really jonesing for them, a small side of grits then I could have a taste of everything while retaining the ability to walk away when the meal concluded instead of being rolled away like the blueberry girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. 

Today I decided to escape housecleaning and dog nursing in order to go to Waffle House. I wanted all of the above, but was keenly aware that I could not eat all that by myself. Maybe if j^C were here to help, but that’s a moot point. I decided what I wanted most was a strawberry waffle. I should have stopped there, but I looked at the menu and realized that they also had chocolate chip waffles. “OK,” I said to myself. “People eat 2 waffles for breakfast – otherwise they wouldn’t have double listed on the menu. I’ll get a strawberry and a chocolate one!”

Cus that’s a good idea.

There were many ways to have avoided ordering 2 waffles. Choose one or the other. Have one with half strawberry and half chocolate. Have them make a hybrid strawberry/chocolate chip one. But no. I was a gloo-ton. I ordered 2 whole waffles. Waffles that were as big as the plates they were served on. Two, piping hot, sugar laden, carb disks. I didn’t even finish one of the sugary manhole covers and they misunderstood my request so they wound up both strawberry/chocolate chip hybrids anyway.

You know what the saddest part of this little escapade was. I don’t really like restaurant waffles. The first time I got a waffle at a Huddle House when I was a kid, they brought it to me and I was all like “What the hell is this? Take this soggy, limp thing back and bring me a waffle.” See, I had nothing but Eggo waffles for the first 10 or so years of my life, so crispy and small is good. By the by, why there isn’t a uniform Eggo waffle size isn’t a law I will never know. They don’t need to be a foot across.

Eggos are also not as sweet as restaurant waffles which is good since I really don’t even like sweet foods. I like fruit. Melon in particular. It’s my primitive monkey brain that thinks I do. It tells me “You are a female! Females like sweet and sugary and chocolaty! GO EAT THAT!!! MWAHAHAHAH!” Then, I eat some sweet and sugary and chocolatly thing and feel like crap. At this moment, a big bowl of various sundry melon reveals itself as the better choice, but now, of course, it’s too late. This is what is referred to as a FAIL. Moments like these are why I am going to someday lose a limb to diabetes.   I think Eggos are pretty much perfect. I could have saved myself a lot of time, money, carbs, sugar, calories, fat, gas, and energy by just buying a box at the Food Lion and being done with it.

I kind of just want to cry, but I might throw up since I am teetering dangerously close to both being overfull and slipping into a sugar coma. I guess the copious amounts of nearly black coffee I’m drinking will either snap me out of it or cause my heart to stop. At least I didn’t use any syrup. Here’s to small victories.